I stand here before you
I can’t run anymore. I don’t have the strength to climb
So I descend, from your pillar of shame
I scrounge for whatever bravery I can scrape from the ground, starving for what I have never tasted:
I look up, and there you are
Again and Again and Again
You present yourself unannounced, following my every move- mocking me. Taunting me. You stand behind a protective layer of glass, far from my reach, where my hands have the desire to choke you. And the desire to smother your face.
That is everyday
I am afraid of everyday.
You’re everything I don’t want to be, are the words that roll off of my tongue, naturally
With truth. And with conviction. Without effort
“Look a little closer”
I refuse to look within her prying eyes…
Deny Deny Deny
Two fingers, which I have declared to the world by pointing them in a V, are now used to demonstrate the opposite of peace. They cover my eyes from what I don’t want to see, because I am at war with myself.
The girl in the mirror knows
And you caused it.
Her eyes insist a kind of honesty I have replaced with animosity. The girl in the mirror has changed
I refuse to follow.
I refuse to look.
I refuse to engage.
She disappears behind a layer of fog I have marked with each exhaled breath.
Unable to see her
I find comfort.
Face your fears- we are told. And so I’ve heard.
But what if the fear I face is… me?
And who the hell was I
In front of you
When it was all a waste of time.
Who are you to inspect my mind?
You’re not inclined to think like I
I and I
We meet with eyes
Eyes, which are the window to your soul
A soul, which you do not have
My soul you will never steal
For you are
The girl in the mirror.
(Photo Credit: annstreetstudio.com)
Our whole lives are spent searching for happiness. It can be attained. It can be lost. How daunting it can be. Happiness is but a flicker, a flame, a glimpse. Our reservoir of smiles soon runs dry, only to be filled with tears, until we find happiness again. We are overwhelmed. Hope becomes a virtue to live by; seeking smiles instead of tears. Whatever made us happy begins to lose its significance. What makes us happy doesn’t last a lifetime…
Then again, neither do we.
(Photo Credit: saypeople.com)
Tonight I got stuck in a daydream. As I looked out the coffee shop window, these are a few of the strange things I thought about…
Do you ever get stuck in a daydream? It’s that holy shit moment when you realize you’re alive. Tangible, heart beating, breathing you, is alive. For a moment it’s like your mind leaves your body and is looking down at you like its got eyes. Your mind stares at you and tries to make sense of your existence as if all along you felt like you never existed. It’s a weird moment of realization. A weird moment of realization I just experienced.
I sometimes wonder are birds really happy to be birds? Do they wish to be humans like humans wish they could be birds? And what about insects? Do they know that they are despised by most of us? Does an ant fear shadows? Does every shadow resemble a shoe?
Are men attractive because they’re taken or are they taken because they’re attractive? What makes someone attractive? Do the laws of attraction eliminate the laws of boredom? And what is love? Is it really a feeling or a feeling dictated by what we measure as greatness and what we value? And beauty. Is it truly in the eye of the beholder. Are we the beholder in control of what we think is beautiful or is beauty a construction? Can we live without love? Can we go our entire lives loving only ourselves and not someone else? What happens if you don’t find love? Does it mean you’re not complete? Can we find happiness in being lonely?
Knowledge is power. Is it really though? Does our knowledge allow us to exercise our power to change things? Does having knowledge mean you are better than the person who is less knowledgeable than you? Does having knowledge make you powerful because you can challenge others? Does having knowledge sometimes make you feel powerless?
What are we without our dreams? Do our dreams give us wings to soar to greater heights? What happens if our dreams don’t come true? Is it because we didn’t try hard enough or is it because life and the circumstances involved in it stopped us? Is a fork in the road so-to-speak a sign to give up or is it a sign to keep moving forward, driving you to succeed? What is success? Who determines success? Can success truly be measured by oneself and not by others? If so, is that bias?
Inspirational quotes. Do they inspire us genuinely? Or do they inspire us because they contradict who we are. Do the people who write them live by these words or are these words just a way for them to be seen; for them to be labelled profound?
…and last but not least- boxers or briefs? I’m kidding. I suppose I’ll end my cluster of random questions here. Feel free to answer any of them.